Hazing gays
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The other four pledge masters — dressed in all-black and looking as ominous as ever — stood 10 feet across from them. I wanted to prove to myself and to others that I could handle the challenges and be an equal, regardless of my sexuality.
Turning off the main road, we entered a damp, empty single-story parking structure.
experiencing my brothers’ genuine care and acceptance, I knew I had finally found it.
“I hope telling my story might also open the minds of people who think it’s impossible for a gay guy to thrive in a fraternity.”
I know not every gay pledge is as lucky as I was. Countless others are injured or traumatized by hazing.
Aiello’s experience could easily have ended in tragedy.
We were exposing our true, unfiltered selves. That’s all I can ask for,” I told them.
This was what I had always hoped for: a community where I could be supported and be myself. He’s currently finishing up his debut novel, “Tales of a Gay Frat Star.” Follow his book journey on Instagram, TikTok or Twitter @gayfratstar.
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Brothers would ask, “What was coming out like?” and “How can we better support you?” My closet door was wide open. She feared that as a young gay man who had come out just a month earlier, I would be rejected or maybe even harmed. Our three shovels were soon taken away because, according to them, our progress had slowed. He was always around. This moment, shrouded in uncertainty, mirrored the complex feelings I’d been wrestling with since joining the fraternity three weeks earlier.
My scrawny body struggled to keep up with the others, which was even more difficult thanks to the three previous weeks I’d spent staying up late and drinking heavily. Our voices united in a chant that declared our solidarity: “PLEDGE CLASS OF ONE!”
As our toes made contact with the water, an eerie silence enveloped us. I wanted to prove to myself and to others that I could handle the challenges and be an equal, regardless of my sexuality.
Escape no longer seemed an option.
Once The Leader caught up to us, he outlined the purpose of the hazing exercise. The Leader, the nickname for our main pledge master, was waiting for us at the entrance gate.
“Leave your phones in the car,” commanded the intimidating young man with a permanent frown, tightened jaw, and ghostly pale skin.
After I stepped out of my truck, The Leader pointed down a road.
It’s a testament to the progress we’ve made as a society, and a reminder of the work still to be done to ensure that everyone, regardless of their sexual orientation, can find a place where they feel accepted, respected and valued.
“Beach Night” was truly a turning point in my life, and from then on, everything was different.
“It’s a trick!” another yelled.
Hazing: My Journey as Fraternity's First Openly Gay Member
This personal narrative recounts the author's experiences as the first openly gay member of a fraternity, exploring themes of belonging, acceptance, and the dark side of hazing.
On a cold, stormy September night in 2018, my 14 fraternity pledge brothers and I received this ambiguous text from one of our pledge masters: “Tonight’s education meeting is canceled.
“This brotherhood makes me realize what life’s all about — having a group of friends who love me. I played wingman at sorority mixers and got praised for effortlessly starting conversations between my brothers and pretty girls. I was captivated by what was taking place around me.
One by one my brothers began to open up about shattered athletic careers, battles with drug addiction, eating disorders and anxiety.
After I stepped out of my truck, The Leader pointed down a road.